Foundational Milkshake Flavors

This was the very first time the Opposum had ever tried a chocolate-mint milkshake. She was with her friend Haley, a Squirrel who had found out that the Opposum had never had that particular milkshake and was completely in shock.

“How have you never had a chocolate-mint milkshake?” Haley asked.

“Well, there’s a lot of milkshakes out there,” Rhonda, the Opossum, replied, “I just never had that one, is that weird?”

“No, I guess it’s not weird,” Hayley admitted, reluctantly, “But chocolate mint just felt like one of those universal flavors to me. Like Vanilla, or regular chocolate, or Coconut Caramel Sunshine Dream.”

Rhonda was taken aback.

“Coconut. Caramel. Sunshine. Dream?” Rhonda asked, confused.

“You’ve got to be kidding me…” Hayley said, shocked, “You’ve never had Coconut Caramel Sunshine Dream either?”

“No? I’ve never even heard of it!” Rhonda replied, “What do you think foundational flavor means?”

Hayley had never felt so unsure of what were previously very firm and solid views on milkshake flavors. Had she been living a lie this entire time? How had she made it through life like this?

Meanwhile, Rhonda was gleefully devouring the very first chocolate mint shake of her life. She had to admit it was pretty good. Definitely one that she had hoped she had tried sooner, but alas she never had. She will likely have to make up for lost time and drink several more of them over the coming weeks, months, and years.

“I’ll tell you what though,” Rhonda began, “I wish chocolate-mint was one of my foundational flavors. It’s pretty good.”

“Oh I’m glad to hear that,” Hayley answered.

But it was too late. Hayley’s entire conception of the milkshake world had been shattered. This likely wouldn’t have many downstream consequences to other things in her life but… there would certainly be some.

Some days you’re just not ready to be confronted with the fact that something you thought you knew for certain was actually completely in your head. On those days all you can really do is find your nearest Coconut Caramel Sunshine Dream milkshake, order the largest size you can, and take comfort in what you no longer know.